You Blocked Me On Facebook... And Now You're Going to Die!

No I didn't get blocked. No I didn't block anyone. Yet I feel like there are parts of this song that I really connect to. I'm so dependent on the internet to talk to anyone back in the US that if they don't reply, don't answer, never start the conversation I am left wondering what went wrong? I have had some pretty ugly fleeting thoughts in times of uncertainty with this type of stuff, so I just had to post this song after I
heard it.

In other news, it seems like the rest of the world is continuing on with their personal lives. Possible dates, new relationships, hope... It hurts for several reasons in these circumstances.

1) I have sort of weird history with all the guys I talk to back in the states. We tried, sort of succeeded and failed and retried dating or whatevering over breaks, when I was home. It hasn't left me with much in terms of a boyfriend or potential boyfriend, but I have made some decent friends (most of the time).

2) Jealousy... stemming form above fucked up complicated relationships. Emotions were involve in these things, but it clearly wasn't enough to overcome a 6 month separation.

3) It points out my own lack of a personal life and I think that hurts the most... I really want them to be happy, but it takes a lot to swallow my own misery and watch them go off into the sunset. I put on my best face and bury my head back into a textbook, so I don't lash out.


Now that I've gotten that out of the way, excuse me while I go back and learn how the actual heart fucks up (Cardiovascular pathology).